[Previous entry: "Sneaky Egg Switch"] [Main Index] [Next entry: "Gay Marriage"]

02/11/2004 Archived Entry: "Spooky Party"

I'm already getting tired of all that fake get-up-and-go-usa attitude from the Presidential elections.

I like the idea of the "Spooky Party". If I were running as the Spooky candidate, I would try to get everyone so pessimistic that they would be really pleased that things during my administration actually go OK. I would certainly have a sombre style that GWB lacks.

Yes, yes! I can imagine it now. Ted Copple is interviewing me.

TC: Nica, if you are elected what would Americans have to look forward to?

N: It will be the same as it has been for eons: the pain of birth, the struggle of life, the release of death.

TC: So you offer nothing?

N: I hope I can offer some comfort for the beings of this nation. Perhaps, in times of particulars intense misery, I can offer the people a kind word, and remind the citizens that though their sadness is great, those before have survived.

TC: How would you provide security for the nation?

N: I would incessantly remind all those in this nation to be wary of all things around them. Our civilization is now reliant on technology which cannot be properly tested. We comfort ourselves with friends and family, all of whom may disappoint us with deceit. New diseases are developing throughout the globe bring new modes of death and suffering.

TC: Your opponents consider you morbid, and maybe insane.

N: If insanity is recognizing that disease, tragedy, and death are inevitable, then I am insane. Life itself seems morbid through my eyes.

TC: Why should anyone vote for you?

N: I will not promise paradise and other such fictions. I will mentally prepared all of our nations for the inherent discomfort of existence.

Hmmm...I would have to dress properly for this sort of campaign.

Entries and Images Copywrite M. Stewart